When you have lost faith in yourself even the smallest tasks can seem too difficult. They seem pointless. A few weeks ago I had to force myself to make dinner for my children. I had to force myself to do normal tasks around the house. I didn’t care how I looked I just followed my personal routine out of habit.
I found it next to impossible to leave the house and see friends. When I did I worried I would either break down into shameful tears or go on an angry rant, I would scurry home after a short time. Each day was a duty call and I made it to the end of each day only by putting one foot ahead of the other. I tried not to look up and see where I was going because I was really afraid of what I would see.
In the last week I felt my personal weather changing. It is not so dark and gloomy all the time the clouds seemed to be lifting. I felt more determined to get on with life rather then just survive the day. Today thanks to the support of my old boss and his confidence in me I have been given a positive forecast with an opportunity to do a sales contract for a property development company. I am so excited and relieved. The real me was present and engaged today. I truly feel I can walk now without looking at my feet.
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